Book Notes: Encylopedia of Sports Parenting

I picked up "The Encyclopedia of Sports Parenting" by Dan Doyle from the library today and read most of it in one sitting. It's a very comprehensive look at, to state the obvious, being the parent of a child who plays sports at a variety of levels. The book does a great job breaking down the differences between youth/recreational sports, high school and higher levels like travel sports and college.

I focused my attention on the youth sports chapters and concepts and got a few really good things out of this book. In particular, I'm totally in agreement with the book around issues of sportsmanship, fair play and what Doyle calls a "values based sports parenting philosophy." His framework hinges on two "anchors" that form the foundation of any child's experience and life: Character Development and Training the Mind.

As both a parent and a coach, I think I've done a good job in this area by connecting the dots for my children and players that winning is not the only thing and that learning the game, having passion for what you are doing and loving your teammates is job #1. As my girls get older, I am realizing that more and more that this is exactly where my focus should be at all times, both as parent and coach.

Doyle lays out eleven important values learned from sports, listed here:

1. Balance and perspective
2. Honest/good sportsmanship
3. Self-reliance/responsibility
4. Self-control/non-violence
5. Hard work/perseverance
6. Respect
7. Empathy
8. Teamwork/unselfishness
9. Tolerance
10. Moral courage
11. Physical fitness

Looking back at the past 5 years of coaching, I realize that these are indeed amazingly important values that in many ways, I've been teaching over and over again, increasingly each year as my girls get older.

That said, I now realize that I need to connect the dots back off the field as well - those anchors are not meant as a framework for sports success, but as an anchor for life success. Right now, one area of real concern and focus for me is instilling the value of hard work and self-reliance. Encouraging them to be as good as they can in all areas of life by having them work towards goals, put in the practice time and always give their best efforts are areas I believe we can all continually strive to improve on!

If you have a kid playing sports, I would recommend that you read this book immediately!